Letters That Heal: Why You Need to Parent Your Inner Child First

“The voice you use to speak to your child is often shaped by the voice that spoke to you.”

And if we’re honest…
Many of us were raised by parents doing the best they could,
But not always the best we needed.
• Maybe you grew up with silence where there should have been comfort.
• Criticism where there should have been guidance.
• Rules where there should have been relationship.

Now you’re parenting…
But your child’s emotions feel “too much.”
Their tears feel like a threat.
Their freedom feels unsafe.
Why?

Because unhealed trauma becomes parenting patterns.

The child inside you, the one who never got to cry, play, rest, or speak freely.
That child is still knocking, still needing, still influencing the way you see your own child.

👣 So what do you do?

You go back.
Not in bitterness, but in healing.
You go back and say the words that were never said.
You offer comfort, validation, and kindness to you.

Write a letter to your inner child.
Start it with:

“Dear younger me, I’m so sorry no one protected you when…”

“You didn’t deserve the silence when…”

“Today, I choose to love and parent you differently…”

It will feel strange at first.
Maybe even emotional.
But trust me, something powerful happens when you stop ignoring your own pain and start parenting your own heart.

🕊️Why this matters…

Because healed parents raise safe children.
Because you don’t want to pass down what you worked so hard to survive.
Because the legacy you’re building must begin with healing, not hiding.

And most of all; Because you matter, too.

📌 Reflection Exercise:
• What did you need to hear as a child?
• What memory still stings more than it should?
• What triggers in parenting bring up unresolved pain?

📖 Scripture to pray with:

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18

Let this be the beginning of your healing.
Write that letter.
Speak the truth.
Then go hug your child, not just with your arms, but with your healed heart.

Family Nest Academy
Princess Obi-Chimezie