“I’m Beating the Devil Out of You!”
I’ll never forget that night.
The house was silent, except for her screams. My cousin had broken a plate while washing the dishes. She was only 10. Her mother’s response?
A slap. A cord. A storm of angry words soaked in Bible verses.
“She who spares the rod hates her child!”
“You will not grow up to be useless like your father!”
We sat frozen in the living room, the rest of us cousins. Afraid. Confused. Watching correction turn into cruelty.
Later that night, I asked her, “What did you learn?”
She whispered, “Not to cry out loud.”
And that’s when it hit me: Discipline had become distorted.
📌 So Let’s Talk: What Discipline Is NOT
If we want godly homes, we’ve got to start unlearning a few things we’ve mislabelled as “discipline.” Here’s what discipline is NOT:
- ❌ Discipline is NOT Punishment
• Punishment says: “You did wrong, so now suffer.”
• Discipline says: “You did wrong, now let’s grow.”
God disciplines us as sons (Hebrews 12:6), not as criminals.
- ❌ Discipline is NOT Shaming
• Calling children useless, stupid, or like their no-good father does not correct, it corrodes.
• Shame doesn’t shape; it scars. -
❌ Discipline is NOT Venting Anger
• Yelling or hitting because you’re tired, stressed or triggered is emotional dumping not training.
• “Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.” (James 1:20) -
❌ Discipline is NOT Control
• Making your children fear you so they behave when you’re around is not godly parenting. It’s manipulation.
• God wants transformation, not just compliance. -
❌ Discipline is NOT Instant Obedience at All Costs
• God is patient with us.
• If a child doesn’t understand your instruction the first time, they don’t need beating, they need teaching.
🙏 God’s Model: Discipleship, Not Domination
The word discipline comes from the same root as disciple. It’s about guidance, growth, and grace.
God disciplines us to shape us not shame us.
To draw us near not drive us away.
To prepare us for purpose not punish us into silence.
💡Let’s Reflect:
• Have I confused discipline with punishment in my parenting style?
• Do my children feel safe with me even when they’ve done wrong?
• Would God recognize His parenting style in mine?
🕊️ Final Words:
Let’s raise children who fear God, not just fear us.
Let’s correct with compassion.
Let’s parent like our Father in Heaven.
Let’s stop hiding abuse behind Bible verses.
Discipline is not about pain. It’s about purpose.
📣 Call to Action:
Share this with a parent, caregiver, or pastor.
Start a conversation at home, in your church, or in your WhatsApp group.
Let’s correct the culture of correction.
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